Forgiveness as seen as a healing gift to oneself, and as
radical acceptance of the human condition.
An Acknowledgement of Brokenness.
Recent years have seen a developing psychotherapeutic
interest in the power of forgiveness as a means to healing. The psychologist Robert Enright has devised a
therapeutic technique that focuses on leading people through a process of
forgiveness.
He finds
that people who feel incapable of or unwilling to forgive past hurts experience
greater levels of anxiety and depression. They are also at a higher risk of cardiovascular
disease and cancer.
The process of forgiveness is a complex and subtle
business.
Imagine you have suffered an
injustice.
It is something that violates your rights and dignity
The Result:
You feel angry and resentful toward the
offender.
Anger, resentment and hatred are painful
emotions. We are told to immediately forgive but it may not be a good thing to forgive too soon:
1. There is perhaps much to be said for anger as an
appropriate initial response to violations of one’s own, or another’s rights
and dignity.
2. The victim of the injustice
has had their rights violated. They deserve to have been treated better.
3. Anger honours the serious moral infraction that
has taken place, but is a painful emotion and blocks the opportunity
to have more pleasant experiences.
•
In our culture, we are encouraged to learn that we
must avoid our painful feelings.
•
Trying to forgive prematurely as an attempt to avoid
the pain of anger is unfruitful. The feeling of anger as an initial response to
injustice can be evaluated as perfectly appropriate and healthy.
•
Forgiving others enables people to forgive themselves
more easily, leading to a life less snarled up by negative and self-attacking
thoughts and futile struggle with a past that cannot be changed.
•
Self-forgiveness, as well as forgiveness of others,
promotes higher self-esteem, physical health, vitality and a happier life.
© Gary Powell, 2008.
Modified for those who are Christ followers by Margie Ford
